Today turned out to be good. I worked in the prep room from 8-11:15, and apart from being harmlessly stupid from time to time, it went well. Melissa is so nice and doesn't make me feel stupid at all.
Because I had to skip genetics, I had a little more free time. During that time, I did some research for my group's Biol 2003 project. I'm glad it's actually (possibly) neuroscience-related this time. Biol 2004, on the other hand, seem like it would be annoying, but I handled pretty much everything I could do for now--quiz and homework.
Note: Being obsessed with yeasts doesn't make you cute, FYI. Ugh. And we haven't even started.
Anyway, I had a good time researching. I love biology. To be completely honest, my last semester might have spoiled me too much because pretty much all of the classes revolve around biology, and not the memorizing a bunch of facts aspect of biology; it was more about the philosophy of biology, what makes it so fascinating as a science, how to think like a biologist, and the world of research.
This semester, I have to deal with the philosophy of quantum mechanics, and really, I am not a big fan of physics. It's cool and all. It's the "ideal science" according to the common view in the philosophy of science. But after learning about how amazing biology is and after having gone through evil physics classes, not to mention tutoring people and watching them deal with the evil of physics, I feel like appreciating physics will be a challenge. But if I can come to do that, it would be a true accomplishment.
It's just so intimidating to be sitting in a 5xxx level philosophy class when different groups of intimidating people are in the class. These groups are as follows (some overlap): physics majors, graduate students, definitely-older people, and people that like to use big words.
Biology feels so homely and lovable, whereas physics come off as cold and intimidating... like it can kill you with a smug look on its face. Or something.
So anyway, at 2 I was at the MAC for the tutor training session. I was honestly so happy to be there because I was reminded about how much tutoring meant to me. First, working in the prep room was basically me being completely confused and needing to be guided by Melissa. As a tutor, I was a leader, not a follower. Same goes for Y-Scholars. Even when I worked at the bookstore, I was the one that knew how to do things and report problems properly to manager (without panicking).
Last semester was so much discovering how amazing biology is and how much of a leader I can be.
This semester involves utter confusion and trying to appreciate physics.
Philosophy of science is so difficult when you don't know the science that well. However, I've been thinking about how studying this history and philosophy of science is something that interests me a lot. It's hard to explain what I really love about science, but I know that it's not really the actual doing of science itself. I feel like my life wouldn't feel complete if all I end up being is a scientist (though I don't doubt that many professional scientists out there do appreciate science at a deeper level than we may think). I love science in the humanistic sense. I think it's a great project that humanity has worked on from the beginning of the history of our species. And we've accomplished so much intellectually. I like looking at the evolution of the conception of scientific thought itself. I mean, it affects a person's view on the world so much. It makes a difference to think that Earth is just a tiny speckle in the vast universe rather than literally being in the middle of the universe. It affects people so deeply in how they view what life is about.
Rather than just reading textbooks and research papers, try reading something more personal from a scientist. The story of the discovery of DNA was one about biologists inspired by the hope that principles of physics would be able to explain the essence of life.
Arkldja;fkjhdaskfhdaslf. I'm sleepy and is so inclined toward just ending this post right here.
I guess I'll continue with this topic some other time (in a new post).
For all the friends you've ever met
Some you'll love and some forget
Just hold on for tomorrow
- from "Truth Begins" by Dirty Pretty Things (awesome song, btw)
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